Hello, well it has been very quiet here on the Sleep Lover blog and the reason for my absence is I have gone back to full time work. After fourteen years of being at home with the junior Sleep Lovers I have returned to the workforce. Those fourteen years have flown by.
It has been a massive shock to the system going from doing as I please each day to being back in an office. Even though I thought I was tired before I returned to work, my tiredness has gone to the next level.
My bags under my eyes have bags! The other day I thought my mascara had smudged and while trying to wipe it off I realised it was dark circles. Argh!!
The first two weeks were hard. I don’t think I have ever been so physically and mentally tired. It’s been awhile since I had to concentrate all day. I was coming home each night and collapsing on the couch. Thankfully, Mr Sleep Lover kept things running smoothly on the home front by taking over dinner duties and getting the junior Sleep Lovers to bed.
The last time I was as tired was when our second oldest Sleep Lover didn’t sleep for the the first seventeen months when she was a baby.
Then on top of the tiredness my anxiety levels were at an all time high. I was all over the place emotionally and also feeling guilty about not doing it all. All the cooking, cleaning and being at everything for the kids. I was even angry that I had to work. I had to remind myself that it was my decision to go back to work. But as you know when you are exhausted you aren’t thinking rationally.
Another reason my anxiety was through the roof was the fear of failure and making mistakes. I report to a much younger person and didn’t want him thinking he had made a mistake in employing me.
I knew my anxiety had gotten out of control when I got upset at Mr Sleep Lover as he was doing such a good job with cooking dinner, making school lunches and generally holding everything together. I felt like I had been made redundant. How crazy is that?
I didn’t plan to be back at work so quick after deciding it felt like the time was right to reenter the workforce. Our youngest Sleep Lover started school this year so I had no one at home and I felt there was no reason for me to be at home. I also wanted to contribute financially to the family and to show the junior sleep lovers that I have skills other than being their mum.
Mr Sleep Lover has taken a job closer to home so we got to see more of him and he can now help out with running the Sleep Lovers around. So the timing was right for me to start thinking about a return to work. Also the thought of having a bit extra money was very appealing.
The first step was to get my resume in order and speak to a recruitment agency about my long career break. During the fourteen years I was at home we also moved interstate three times, each time with a new baby. Mr Sleep Lover did a lot of travelling for his work during this time and I know I wouldn’t have coped with working, young children and lack of sleep. It’s funny how things work out as I never had any intentions of being a stay at home mum at all.
I was fortunate that I was able to successfully get a job so quickly and the company have provided training for the parts of the job that I hadn’t done before. They are also a family first company. This was very important to me as after being a full time mum I still wanted to be able to get to the Sleep Lovers events. It means now some days I take my lunch break early or late so I can get to things like swimming carnivals or performances. Now I’m working it made me realise how many things the Sleep Lovers have on.
The junior Sleep Lovers are fine with my return to work but I have been feeling guilty about leaving the puppy home alone. We only got Evie our cavoodle in June and I know she is okay during the day but I still pop home at lunchtime to check on her.
We have found a great babysitter who picks the junior Sleep Lovers up from school and takes them to their after school activities three nights a week. Mr Sleep Lover is able to do the other nights which is one of the benefits to having him work locally. The grandparents are an hour away and are on standby if needed. This makes it easier knowing that the kids are so well looked after.
But the big test was a few weeks ago when I had to solo parent as Mr Sleep Lover and our 10 year old went away for a school trip. Thanks to Hello Fresh I was all sorted each night with delicious and easy to prepare meals. The teenage Sleep Lover was an enormous help as well. Luckily he takes payment in PlayStation time so he never complains when I ask him to help me out.
I collapse into bed at night around 9.30 pm and sleep soundly for 8-9 hours at night as I am so tired, but it is getting better. One good thing is I am now in a routine of getting up early and taking Evie for a walk. I also make sure I am ready before all the Sleep Lovers are up.
It has been an unusually busy time at Sleep Lover HQ with the calendar full of activities but now I am making sure we don’t have too many commitments on the weekends and during the week so I can keep on top of things. I have gotten protective of my free time to make sure I don’t get too tired.
Another benefit of my return to work is I’m too busy to eat the crap food I was eating so my weight is slowly (and I mean slowly) going down. Eating better has also helped with my energy levels. So I am really going to focus on eating healthier to help with the tiredness.
My sister asked Mr Sleep Lover how things were after a few weeks and he said it had been a bit bumpy. That still makes me laugh. What a nice way to say I had lost my mind!
Thankfully things have improved and there are not as many bumps now as there were when I first went back to work. I know things will keep on improving as we all settle into our new normal.
Please tell me your tips and tricks to make the work/life balance easier and if you had a break from the workforce how long was it?
